Facebook is a really good place to nurture a superiority complex.
It also reinforces my belief that I may be, quite possibly, the meanest human being on the planet for making fun of the people (some of them my OWN BLOOD RELATIVES) who are posting godawful greeting card shite like this:
Fathers Day Approaches:
Roses grow in Heaven, Lord, pick a bunch for me.
Place them in my Dad's arms & tell him they're from me.
Tell him that I love & miss him & when he turns to smile,
place a kiss upon his cheek & hold him for a while.
Because remembering... him is..easy.. I do it everyday.
There's an ache within my heart that will never go away.
Copy & paste if your Dad is in Heaven. Love and miss you Dad!
If there turns out to be an afterlife and I find out people are using my name in the same ROOM as shit like this, I swear I will come back and haunt them. And not in a good way.
4 comments:
The worst schmaltzy poetry is shit that rhymes. I never buy cards that rhyme. Of course, for my wife these days, I have to avoid words like "love" too. Don't want her rolling her eyes.
So do you make fun of them in comments? You should. I hope when I'm gone and some sentimental daughter-in-law posts something like that, my other son says, "Fuck that, if there's a Heaven then Dad's in some celestial Chinese whorehouse right now."
I have people annoyed at me for trashing the Philadelphia FLYERS on FB, there's no WAY I'm touching this one. My Dad's DEAD and I wouldn't post crap like this.
Then again, I make 9/11 jokes.
Gag. What you should do is friend me and check out my awesome flame-thread today on BP. No rhymes. :)
I done did my best, your thread to infest. My fine reparte really did make my day.
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