Two of the NHL's toughest enforcers, Donald Brashear and Eric Godard, living The Code.
Just as in the NHL there exists an unwritten Code of Conduct when it comes to fighting and retaliation, when you're someone's not-wife, you must abide by certain rules.
To avoid confusion as the affair progresses, it's good to revisit these rules occasionally, otherwise you run the risk of getting entangled in the weedy kudzu of emotions, self-delusion, and broken hearts. And you risk having your franchise player, your Sidney Crosby if you will, otherwise known as "your heart," injured, possibly in a season-ending way.
A step backward and a clear-eyed look at the situation are required every now and then to enable you to keep your wits and, most importantly, your dignity.
The basic rules are quite similar to The Code of the NHL, but I believe no one has written them down until now. I will attempt to do so here, with cautionary examples from my own experience.
In Summary, the Rules of The Code Are:
1) Know the rules going in.
2) Keep your head up at all times and know what's going on around you. See the entire playing surface, not just the guy in front of you.
3) Know when to drop the gloves and what the rules of engagement are once the gloves come off.
4) Know what The Instigator Rule is.
5) Know how to play hurt.
6) Maintain respect and toughness.
7) Blindside hits and boarding will get you an automatic Game Misconduct, resulting in ejection for the remainder of the game. It will also give you a reputation as a cheapshot artist.
8) Keep your mouth shut and avoid bench-clearing brawls in which wives, children, family, and friends get involved.
9) Know when you've lost the fight.
I'll be fleshing all of this out as we go along, because clearly I broke Rule #2 in a huge, huge, huge way.
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