Photodump: Old School, Plus Some Random Saturday Musings

It's the silly season in fashion advertising, so I am in the office today. In between organizing the dumpster that my desk has become, churning out printing estimates and eating a pastrami sandwich, I figure now is as good a time as any to toss out some more pics that I just put up on Facebook for my family and friends to look at. And I've slowly been coming out on Blogger, so who knows, maybe someday I'll even tell you my real name.

Then again, I may just say, "What do you WANT my name to be?"




These are pictures of a preternaturally happy and smiling child. What can I say? I never doubted that I was loved. So sue me. Footy pajamas, a funny hat, and a whistle -- nothing has really changed that much, has it? You can tell my hyperanal Japanese mother must have dressed me, because my pajama top is TUCKED into the bottoms. Jesus, now it's a fancy day if I comb my hair more than once. What's really funny is that my hands still look exactly like they do in these pictures.




Oy vey, did I think I was the SHIT? Well, in my high school if you were on this squad, you kind of were the shit. Except if you were a nerd, like me. We had to sew our own skirts, with the instruction, "Hold your arm at your side and make a fist. That's where your skirt should hit." Do you know how frickin' SHORT that is? I still have these boots. Alas, they remain in a box. Still waiting for the right person to wear them for. Well, Halloween does come every year.




My younger brother calls this "The Jesus Picture." If you grew up Catholic, you know what I mean. Every household had either a picture of the Infant of Prague or the glowing, aryan Jesus looking heavenward. When I was 16, I hated the way I looked, but I also used to tell myself, "You will like your face when you're 40." And you know what? I really like my face now, big nose and all. But still, I look at this picture now and say ruefully to myself, "Shit, I peaked at 16?"




Jesus, the prom. My date was a friend from band. Brian. He was a drummer, and a sophomore. He used to make me laugh really hard, like, pee in your pants a little, laughing. Then again, I laughed a lot like that at that age. Believe it or not, my mother picked this dress. When we walked into the hotel ballroom where the prom was held, one of the chaperones, my creepy psych teacher, leered at me and said, "I never KNEW!" Eeew. You know what really bums me out about this photo? That when I was 17 I didn't have to hold in my stomach and I thought I was fat.




I was the only person in my sorority willing to dress up as the Easter Bunny for the State College Easter Egg Hunt. Come on, this is hilarious. You can't see my hangover in this picture. Going through old pictures, I realized that I do this "ta-dahhhhh" pose a LOT.



And now for today's random things:

Metaphor for my life, right now: As I was walking to the subway earlier, sort of zoning on the heat and the moist breeze and thinking it kind of felt like a day at the beach, my giant wedge heel caught the uneven edge of two sidewalk blocks. And I FELL DOWN! On the STREET! Dudes, I went down hard, on all fours. Sexy, right? In the Grand Street station, I did an inventory. My knees are a little sore, and the heels of my hands still really hurt. I think the shock of falling also jarred all the way up to my right shoulder, because that's feeling a little wonky, too. Strangely enough, there's not a mark on me.

Mambo Death Watch: This may sound a little ghoulish, but lately I find myself coming home and expecting to find my old cat dead on the floor. When I see him stretched out and barely moving, I kind of tiptoe over to him and give him the littlest nudge with my toe. He makes a "Wha?" sound and struggles to his feet, then starts doing his Monty Python routine.

"I'm not dead. I don't want to go on the cart. I feel fine. I think I'll go for a walk. I feel happy."

Of course, this is all conveyed thusly: "Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!"



Okay, enough goofing around for today, back to work.