Splurge

If of thy mortal goods thou art bereft,
And from thy slender store two loaves alone to thee are left,
Sell one, and with the dole
Buy hyacinths to feed thy soul.
- Moslih Eddin (Muslih-un-Din) Saadi (Sadi), Gulistan (Garden of Roses)

A friend of mine posted recently about a little splurge she treated herself to. I believe the occasional splurge is a good thing. I'm not talking going out an buying a Maybach with your Centurion card. Sometimes a Venti Vanilla Creme Latte can be a splurge. Sometimes a new book. Or a skirt. Or shoes.

I do tend to think small when I splurge. No, seriously. I would be a TERRIBLE 2nd wife, because I don't really want STUFF. This is a problem for men. They like to show the length of their penises by buying stuff. The more expensive the stuff the longer their penis is. (The deBeers "2-month salary guideline" scam plays right into their tiny wiener insecurity.)

Remember, I'm the girl who has been wearing the same pair of Frye boots for almost 20 years. Today I'm wearing a polka-dot dress that I bought 15 years ago at a sale in Macy's. (How many people asked me today, "OOOO, I love your dress, is it ours?") I tend to buy new stuff only when the old stuff is beyond repair, or when there's a wardrobe gap that needs to be filled. Ok, call me cheap. Tyra and I would be pals.

So -- Brown Sandals. I've been looking for a dressy pair of brown sandals that aren't beach shoes, but aren't Louboutins that would require me to give blow jobs in the Port Authority to pay for. And so I started right at home, on our own website, to see what kind of things were there.

And I found the perfect, no, beyond perfect brown sandals. On Sale no less. With my discount, they were -- get this -- FORTY DOLLARS. No one ever clicked a "buy now" button as fast as I did last Thursday.

They arrived today, and here are the hyacinths to feed my soles:

Be kind about my hobbit feet, please. They had a very hard day on Saturday.