Sam Waterston's Nose

So I'm doing my Sunday morning thing -- New York Times, strong Bustelo, an embarrassing amount of laundry -- and Sam Waterston is on "CBS Sunday Morning."

I have loved Sam since "The Killing Fields." (What? You've never seen "The Killing Fields?" Rent it. Right now! But stock up on tissues, 'cause you will need them at the end.)That voice! Those caterpillar eyebrows! That enormous nose!

I love big noses, on men AND women. Angelica Huston and Paloma Picasso come to mind as fine feminine examples -- aren't they gorgeous with their large, proud honkers? And Adrian Brody? Heartthrob!

My favorite of our male models is a young Spaniard named Oriol, whose nose is a definite presence on his face. Shot at the right angle, in the right light, it appears to wander a little to the side. The first time I saw him in person, he was in our offices for a fitting. I was heading back to my office from a meeting, turned a corner, and there he was, with a profile that should be on a coin.



He glanced up from the magazine in his lap, and gave me a half-smile. (Have you ever seen a person who is so beautiful that you have to look away? It's like looking at the sun; you can't do it for fear your eyes may burn up in your head.) All I could do was pin my eyes to the linoleum and speed by. Dazzling. That profile! That nose! (I will wax rhapsodic about Ollie, one of our other models, and his petulant, slightly depraved mouth at another time. Today we're talking about noses.)

Ok. If you insist.



Aside: You can always tell when one of the models is in for a fitting, because a palpable buzz arises as the women go from office to office -- "Oriol's here!" "Nacho is in the fitting studio!" "Valentina just walked in!" Suddenly everyone has to take a slow stroll to the ladies' room. What can I say, we are as mesmerized by beauty as anyone else.

But back to Sam Waterston's nose. If it was attached to, say, Jon Voight's psyche and politics, I'm sure I wouldn't find him nearly as attractive as I do. But the fact that it's attached to such a fine lefty liberal soul makes him hot hot hot to me. Do you think I tune in to endless Law & Order reruns to see Fred Thompson?

Now, Sam the man is turning 70 this year and I think he's still sexy.

Who knows why I like big noses? Maybe it's because my dad had a fine, large proboscis, and every girl, like it or not, for good or for bad, is imprinted by her daddy, whether he was a loving father or an unremitting bastard (I'm one of the lucky ones). Some things just become our DNA (witness my own definite nose).

I don't know what this says about me, if anything, but that voice! That thatch of silver hair! Those fierce eyebrows!

And that nose!