Friday, April 7, 2006

More Proof of the Suburbanization of NYC


Hideous accessories.

I am seeing these dowdy Grandma bags all over the place, being carried by otherwise-stylish women.

Now, in my mountain town, I worked part-time at a ladies clothing store, and these bags were very, very popular with the Texas matrons and their female spawn. (Think women in color-coordinated ski gear, going out on the mountain in FULL MAKEUP with every hair in place. There's a name for them, we called them "bunnies." So ladies, when someone calls you a "ski-bunny" -- take note, it is NOT a compliment.)

It's that whole Preppy Handbook thing that's been coming back (THANK you, Chelsea boys, for bringing back the Izod shirt with upturned collar. Now cut it the fuck out. Can't you see what you've wrought?) Capri pants (NO ONE LOOKS GOOD IN THEM, PEOPLE! They make you look like you have two inch legs!). LEGGINGS (oh, jesus, there's a whole separate entry about THAT). What's next, Bermuda bags? God help us all.

When you think of WASP contributions to culture, fashion and high style doesn't come readily to mind, does it? Shouldn't they stick to the things they know, like golf, banking and closet alcoholism?

I am mystified. Perhaps it is directly linked to the unexplainable popularity of knitting? I think I'm going to take up a dowdy Grandma hobby, I need a dowdy Grandma bag to tote my shit around! (I can't really knock knitting, since my mother was never without some sort of fine handwork at her side -- knitting, crocheting, embroidering, etc.)

It's as if there's some sort of cultural backflow happening, something got turned around, and the things that should stay in the suburbs are leaking into New York. IT SHOULD BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND! Or, as I have suspected for awhile, is New York City over?

Can someone please explain? Can someone please reassure me?

1 comment:

Miss Midwesterly said...

i have nothing comforting to say. i believe firmly that you must never, ever visit the shops in katonah, new york.