Janey's Lessons of 2006

Here are a couple of things I learned this year:

1) If you find yourself in a situation that feels dangerous to your soul or unsafe for your psyche -- get out. You will contort yourself into knots trying to force a fit and only succeed in throwing out your back.

2) If you are dating someone and the sex is bad -- get out. Life is far, far too short to be having bad sex. The corollary to this is -- if you are dating someone whose company you really, really enjoy, and the sex is bad -- get out while you can shake hands like a good sport and say, "No harm, no foul," and remain friends.

3) Listen to your gut at work. If you don't trust your own gut, have your most spiritually sensitive friend come into your office at lunch or to pick you up after work. Give them a tour. They will tell you things about your workplace that you are in complete and total denial about. The signs were all there for me -- the entryway wall was a flat, featureless black, the carpets are black, the uncarpeted areas are black linoleum. The walls were stark white without a single piece of artwork hanging. There was not a plant to be found in any of the common areas. All of the bookshelves in the hallways were devoid of books. I mean, not one book. There was nothing about the place itself that said, "Here's a happy workplace." Baby Boy's reaction was, "The energy at that place SUCKS."

4) If you see someone struggling, offer to help, even if they don't ask for it.

5) Don't work for scumbags. Lie down with dogs, get up with fleas.

6) Be kind, be kind, be kind to someone every day. And remember that you are a someone. (I reallllly forgot this lesson this year).