Because seriously, why bother? They shouldn't even be allowed to add "naise" to the end of this word, because doesn't mayonnaise, by definition, contain eggs?
It's like going to a vegan restaurant and seeing "tempeh bacon" on the menu. You can't call it bacon if it's not bacon! No, not even the turkey bacon! Bacon has to be made from....BACON!
And don't get me started on fake fur. If you hate fur so much, don't even wear the fake kind. I'm not talking about the blatantly fake fur, like the purple Lenny Kravitz thing that I tromp around in during cool weather which, as far as I can tell, is made of Muppets, but the fake fur that looks like the real stuff, the stuff that's good enough to fake out Anna Wintour -- or me -- from fifty paces. (I can spot a department store fur in a heartbeat.) It oughta be called something like "polyester fiber pelted to look like a dead animal."
11 comments:
Fake fur that looks fake is fun. Fake fur that looks real is fun too, but of a different sort. Real fur doesn't bother me but only because the horrible way they treat the animals is not necessary to get the product so if they just did it right ... Not that it matters, can't afford any of that shit anyway. Isn't wearing fur mostly a European thing anyway? I saw oodles in northern Italy but never hide nor hair here.
I think there may be one day in the year we might be able to wear fur 'round here.
Unless we stay inside and crank the A/C down way low.
Hirsute guys ... they just suffer.
I am anti-fur, and also anti-fake fur that looks real which makes it more acceptable to wear real if you can afford it. I don't know that there should be a LAW (probably not); it would be good if people simply quit wearing it and made frowny faces at those who kept on.
I didn't know "naise" meant eggs. Interesting. I'm not much for mayo anyway, so I don't really care, but bacon should be bacon. And crisp!!
Paula you crack me up! I don't know if "naise" means eggs, but it shouldn't be appended to random words unless one's tongue is firmly in one's cheek!
But but but - it takes too long/too many words/too much space on the label to use the phrase "bacon-flavored"!!! Though the phrase they should use is "bacon-like flavored". Ain't nothin' like the real thing, honey.
Five words for you, Keera: "Processed American Cheese Food Product"
Screw mayonnaise. Deli mustard or horseradish spread for roast beef damn it! Spice on everything means I have to drink beer with it.
Aileen, I know which two don't belong: "cheese" and "food". What do I win? A year's supply of texturized vegetable protein? Man, I hope I don't win.
How about a Grilled Processed American Cheese Food Product Sandwich that's cooked in that scary Weight Watcher's "butter?" (only had to try THAT once before I went directly back to butter).
Which proves the rule of thumb: Nothing meant for a dieter has ever tasted good.
Corollary to that: Moderation is good. A little bit of butter never hurt anyone.
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