Thursday, March 13, 2008

Today's Word

If you sense danger and are feeling watchful and cautious, you are not "weary."

You are WARY.

Pronounced as if you are saying the 2nd syllable of the word "beware."

Dear Senator Clinton

You know I love you, but, please, please, please stop doing this with your eyes:





It makes you look a little scary, and a lot crazy.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Stanley Bing, I Have Always Loved You

And now I have found you again!

Nothing personal, Archer. It's not you, it's me.

Height

Height. Height. Height. Height. Height.

Stop saying, "Heighth!"

Jeez, I miss the Grammar Lady.

Spitzer

I can't believe how bummed I am about Eliot Spitzer. I mean, the guy was one of my HEROES, fachrissakes. It's like finding out that Morris Dees was secretly burning crosses and hanging Nazi flags in his basement.

*sigh*

But I did find the FOX Noise report tonight kind of amusing. They interviewed one of the call girl's neighbors outside her $5,000 a month building, and this knuckleheaded chick said something like, "If she lives in a building like this, she shouldn't have to be selling herself." Earth to airhead, how do you THINK a 24-year old can pay for a $5,000 a month apartment? Then Rosanna Scotto says, "Find out what her mother has to say about it..." I switched channels, but I can imagine that Mom probably said something along the lines of,

"HOLY SHIT, my daughter's a HOOKER!"